It Rises in the East

by Claire Baechtel, Grinnell High School '22

April 22, 2020

Untitled photo by Anonymous*

I fell asleep as the sun rose. Not for the first time that day but the second. That midnight I'd been praying to the abomination lurking in the headboard of the bed waiting for me to fall asleep.

I'd said, "If I were a daughter of the clouds might you wonder what I look like up close? I wonder what I look like up close. Teach me how to be okay with what appears when I look myself in the eye."

Part of that night I wasn't awake. Floating on the patronage

of asking myself to breathe. And when there was no exhale, I simply ceased to exist.

In that deadly quiet the black answered, "Bargaining is only part of your mind's way of answering the question you ask. Ask again when you are ready to reach acceptance."